Going Bald

Since my hair had been making a mess all over the house I asked my husband to just shave what was left off.  He wanted to make sure I really wanted to and that I wasn't just doing it to be crazy. :)  So on May 19th or 20th, we did it.  I wasn't sure how I would feel....but my sweet husband encouraged me and made me still feel attractive.  He said, "Just look at yourself...it doesn't look bad at all...I kind of like it."  And I looked in the mirror...and it wasn't that bad.  My head actually isn't a bad shape but it sure is white. :)  My husband was like, "Dang your head is white."  But I have always, since I was a born, had hair on my head...of course it is white. I was kind of nervous on how the girls would react to it so I went down with a scarf on my head.  My oldest wanted to know why I had that on my head so I told her that the rest of my hair was gone...Mama doesn't have hair anymore.  She of course wanted to see...so I took of my scarf and showed her my head and told her, "Feel it, it feels funny".  So, she rubbed my head and laughed, then the youngest followed her big sister and did the same.  They handled it so much better than I could have hoped for. 

I got some hats and scarves to cover my head, but after I had been bald for a few days, I just started leaving the coverings off at home.  I feel much more comfortable without something on my head.  Of course I put something on my head when I go out...and now I can't really walk around without people knowing something is wrong.  When I had my hair still, no one could tell I was sick...without it...there is no denying it.  I tried on my wig...and it just looked wrong...and the girls didn't like it.  The oldest said, "What's that hair on you?" :)  I recently had the bangs trimmed which helped a lot.  It looks better and more natural now, but...it just isn't my hair.  Maybe I am just not a wig person...

My husband said I should get a tattoo on my head and then when my hair grows back in...no one will even know it is there. I think that would be entirely too painful...and I really wouldn't want to spend money on a tattoo that would be covered up with my hair...that no one, not even I would be able to see. ;)

I must say there are some nice things about going bald...  Showers are much faster and I don't have to spend time blow-drying my hair.  I am much cooler outside in this summer heat.  I can stand in a wind and there isn't any annoying hair blowing in my face.  And the rest of my body too...my legs stay smooth for days after shaving whereas before it was only hours.  I only shave my underarms maybe once a week instead of daily.  Of course I would rather not have cancer, be going through chemo, and have lost my hair...but I might as well enjoy the benefits while I can.

The two top pictures are right before my husband shaved my head. (I should have put some makeup on..kind of scary picture.)  And the bottom is my glamour bald shot. :) It is weird but these pictures capture how I felt...I felt more sick looking balding than bald.