It has almost been a year since I went to L.A. for my 2nd stem cell transplant. While my body seems to have accepted my sister's cells well; I have not had graft vs. host problems; it continues to have cancer.
After seeing that the cancer continued to grow/spread, the doctor's first option was to take me off the anti-rejection meds and hope that it would cause something called graft vs. disease to happen. They were hoping my sister's cells would just go crazy, killing that cancer. Unfortunately, this didn't happen.
Next, my doctor put me on an oral medication called Afinitor. It says it is an anti-rejection medication, but I believe the doctor said they used it to try to stimulate my immune system to fight cancer growth. (Don't quote me on that one.)
Since my cancer seemed to be unresponsive, and continued to worsen, I restarted chemotherapy in April or May. They put me on a combination of Bendamustine and Rituximab. Bendamustine is the chemotherapy that I was on before my transplant that seemed to be quite effective. The Rituximab is not a chemotherapy, but a targeted therapy that seeks out B cells with CD20 on them.
I went for an updated PET scan in August to see how or if my cancer was responding to the treatment...and the cancer is still progressing. Most of the growth is on my left side. I have a mass that is quite large under my collarbone and into my underarm on my left side that I feel is hindering my entire left side from being able to flush out the cancer. (That of course is just my opinion.)
My doctors felt that my best option is to take the anti-pd1 drug, Keytruda. The drug is not yet approved to treat Hodgkins, but I am receiving the drug off-label, or not for its intended use. It has had good results treating recurrent Hodgkin's in the trials, however they never tested it on someone who has received and allogeneic transplant like I have. The doctor said they don't know what could happen to me; it could cause severe graft vs. host disease.
I know that the Lord's Will will be done, and I am for the most part at peace with that. I know where I am going when I die on this earth; I am going to live in Heaven, with no pain, no sadness, no cancer. I will be worshipping God and Jesus, with my fellow believers who have gone before me. I know that God would not take me out of this world and away from my children unless it was a part of His larger plan. I know that God loves my children more than I ever could, and He wouldn't take me away if it would jeopardize their future salvation. These are the truths that I hold on to when I am thinking that I might not be there for big events in their lives; graduation, marriage, birth of their children, and most importantly when they accept Christ as Savior.
That being said, that doesn't mean that I don't believe in miracles! That doesn't mean that I don't continue to pray for complete healing. I know that God holds the whole world in His hands, that He is in command of my destiny. I know that He has plans for me.
So if you will....keep me in your prayers.
